You never know what a party's going to be like - how many kids there are, who will want to be involved, how old they are - and if it's your first time being a party princess, navigating a party can be terrifying. But don't worry! I've got you covered.
How would you feel if you met Beyoncé? Pretty FLIPPIN' excited, right? You want her to like you, you want to relate to her, but you may just end up ugly crying. And you won't really know until you're in the situation.
That is how kids feel when they meet princesses.
Break It Down
Let's identify the levels of excitement, how they can present themselves, and how to best manage each one.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* Overwhelmed *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
The overwhelmed kid encompasses a lot of variables that, ultimately, cause the kid to cry. Usually the kiddo is just over stimulated and, regardless of how old they are, they need some time to calm down before they can come back to the party (remember our Beyoncé moment).
A good way of helping the situation is encouraging the child to take that moment outside of the scope of the party - a different room works really well - just to cool down with a trusted adult. It's really important to let the child know you'll be here when they're ready to re-join and ensure the parents that their child will get to try any of the activities they may have missed out on while they were cooling off.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
Sometimes the time crunch of a party doesn't allow for exact replicas of activities missed out on (i.e. the game has been put away, time for nail polish to dry). In these situations, just do your best to make the parent and child happy without compromising the integrity of the company's time - giving an extra prize, an added color of eye shadow, leaving extra sticker tattoos for later. *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
Sometimes, a kiddo will just be too overwhelmed to join the party and that's okay too. Just do your best to make the experience a good one.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* Shy *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
The shy child is one of the more difficult ones to navigate - especially when they're the birthday kid.
A trick I like to use is as you're engaging with the rest of the party, always going back to them. If there's a question, ask what they think. When you make a comment, see if they agree. Always offer for them to pick the next activity and see if they want to go first [specifically when they're the birthday child].
But let's break that down into the why behind it because the why matters more than the what.
Ask what they think...
When you're asking them a question it's a good way of bringing them into an already existing conversation. But if they don't have an answer, don't linger too long. Of course, you don't want to cut them off or be impatient, but sometimes providing them with an answer if you can see that they're struggling and still nervous takes away any pressure and creates a natural flow away from them not being ready to engage.
See if they agree...
Having them agree with a comment is useful because it builds into that "I want them to like me - I want to relate to them" thought process. Even if they don't agree, kids will often say yes because they're overwhelmed in a situation.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
What kid is going to say they don't like chocolate when Elsa does?
I mean, no kid is going to say they don't like chocolate...but still.
*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
Offer them choices...
Offering choices - usually between two - can give a shy birthday kiddo a sense of control. Letting them move at their own pace and, hopefully, they'll feel comfy enough to join in.
Bonus trick...
Voice control. Speaking softly, even as a high energy character can take away some of the input they're receiving and get them to a manageable level of stimulation.
They may only warm up to you during photos, if at all. And that's okay. Ultimately, your goal is to engage normally with the party, purpose to include the shy kid by giving gentle check-ins - "Are you ready to join? Not yet? That's okay." - and not make a big deal out them not joining in.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* Engaged *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
The easiest level. Engaged kids are excited for you to be there but know how to share you amongst everyone. They may want to tell you stories about their own world or may have questions about yours. They hang on your every word and are just happy to be along for the ride.
I love having engaged kiddos because these can be some of the best interactions. As a character, you can really focus on the flow of the party and lean into the fiction and story.
Often, parties with overall engaged kids are a whirlwind - over before you know it - and you leave the party genuinely smiling because you know it was a good one.
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:* Amped *:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
Honestly, if there were a child I, well, don't look forward to, the amped child is absolutely it. I feel crazy drained after these parties - think working retail on boxing day in the states.
[not to say these kids are bad, they just really stress me out]
The amped child usually manifests as attention seeking, loud, and interrupting. They typically don't know how to share you with their friends because all they want you to focus on is them. More often than not, the child's parents are MIA and ,of course, this makes managing and directing the party difficult.
Common amped cases I find myself in are:
The Chatterbox will not shut up. not to breath, not for a millisecond. will talk over their friends and interrupt you at every turn (reading stories are hard with this one).
The Look At Me will do anything to keep your attention and will likely tell you to look at them until you acknowledge their existence. escalates quickly. will shove random things in your face.
The Tantrum only comes out if you flat out ignore them. parents sometimes help with this one, but by then it's hard to re-introduce them into the party.
So, what the hell do you do?
Excellent multi-tasking skills. And I mean *chef's kiss* level multi-tasking skills.
You'll be responding to everything the amped child says. Most of the party becomes; get dresses on all the children. "Ah, yes, I'm glad you have a doll of me" interact with a new kid. "Wow! That's a wonderful story!" crafts or nails next? "My goodness. You twirl really well" okay, five more kids need their nails done. - You get it.
If you feel comfortable, you can try to set some boundaries. Something like, "Okay friend, I appreciate you showing me your drawing. But Brinley has been waiting very patiently for me to do their nails and I think we should let them have a turn. That way when we do princess lessons later, everyone will have beautiful nails."
✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*
It's the @kenziiewenz voice for me.
*:･ﾟ✧*:･ﾟ✧
But of course, you can't parent a child and direct a party, so do your best.
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